Friday, May 10, 2013

how can you ever really prepare?

   What a week this has been! I wanted to write a post about my birthing story so everyone knows kind of how it happened. This post will be relatively long but I want to make sure I don't forget anything and writing has really been helping me with dealing with my emotions.

   We scheduled the induction check-in for 9 PM Tuesday at my last appointment with Dr. Pohl. Josh took the day off so we could run some errands and get the house ready for baby! We had instructions to call at 8 PM to see if the bed was ready and if we could still arrive at 9. I thought 8 would never arrive! I called and was told that they were full and were trying to get me a room so they would have to call me back with a time :/ talk about a long wait! Josh and I stayed at home for a little bit, but the car was already packed and I was antsy. We went to Target to get some last minute things and then headed to Dunkin Donuts and McDonalds (one for donut holes, the other for a mango smoothie!). They finally called at 10:15 and said we could come in at 11. 

   Once we arrived, they got me all hooked up and asked a bunch of questions. They also gave me the cervadil which was going to stay in for 12 hours and help soften my cervix. They had to order this from the pharmacy and it took until about 12:30 AM to get it all done. This meant that I would at least be waiting until 12:30 PM the next day. Cervadil doesn't put you in to labor, so to speak, but I actually started having contractions when I walked in the hospital door (funny timing) and cervadil certainly helped intensify those. I had two doses of Fentanyl to help me sleep and when I got up Wednesday morning the labor pains had set in full force. Back labor is no joke! I tried moving around to try and get comfortable but it just wasn't working. Dr. Pohl came in around 10 AM to see how things were going and I let him know how uncomfortable my contractions were. He suggested I get the epidural BEFORE he broke my water. He was planning on breaking my water at 12:30 when the cervadil could be removed. I went ahead and got the epidural and waited for Dr. Pohl to come back - thank God for epidurals because I felt like a whole new person! I started to realize that it was only taking effect on the right side of my body, and I mentioned it to the nurses but they said it could take a while to go all over. Dr. Pohl came in the room and broke my water (remember how they told me I had extra fluid - they weren't kidding!) and about 30 minutes later the contractions were so intense on my left side I was crying from the pain. I told my cousin and best friend (who were visiting) to PLEASE go get the nurse or someone. The anesthesiologist came in and told me he could try to move it around but he really thought a whole new epidural would be better, so we went ahead with that and it worked wonders!
   After the epidural I felt much better and had some visitors and then I was able to take a nap. At 5 PM I felt some pressure so I had the nurse check me and I was at 4 cm, I had been at 2 cm almost since the time I was checked-in. This is also when they started the pitocin. I took another nap after that and woke up at 7 because Dr. Pohl had come to check me again and I had jumped to 9 cm! I was thrilled because I seriously thought the baby was NEVER going to make his grand entrance... Luckily, that was quite a bit of progress and Dr. Pohl said he would come back at 9 to check again. At some point they gave me a button to increase the epidural at my own pace (yay!) and I was using that when I felt more pressure or it was becoming uncomfortable. When he checked me at 9 I was still 9 cm. He told me a story of one mom that stayed at 9 for EIGHT HOURS and then finally delivered, but obviously that would not be the case for me. He did say he would come back in 2 hours to try and let my body progress to 10 cm. Around 10:30 I felt immense pressure and told my nurse to call Dr. Pohl. He came in and checked me and I was still at 9 cm :( He wanted me to try pushing to see if that would help dilate the rest of the way and get the baby's head lower. I pushed 4 or 5 times over 10 minutes but it just wasn't working. Dr. Pohl seemed upset but recommended a c-section, he knew how much I had really wanted to delivery vaginally. He told me that it just wasn't going to work at all. I had already come to peace with the decision of a c-section because I had a feeling it would happen that way all along regardless.
    I was prepped and taken back for the c-section in a matter of 30 minutes. When we got in to the operating room there were about 14 people - some for me and a lot for the baby. They had upped my dosage of the epidural and it gave me a bad case of the shakes. My arms were practically jumping off the tables and it didn't help I was so nervous. I don't know how long the c-section lasted but it felt like an eternity. One of my fears from the beginning was that the baby would be born and wouldn't be crying, but when they pulled Sawyer out he let out a few good cries :) He was also able to breath on his own before they had to intubate him, breathing was just making him too tired. He was born at 12:09 AM on May 9, 2013 weighing in at 8 pounds and 21 & 3/4 inches long! After I went to the recovery room for the mandated 2 hours I was able to go to the NICU around 3 AM to see my precious baby. I only got to stay for a few minutes because I could hardly hold my eyes open at all. I was able to go back to the room at 3:30 AM and rest off an on for the night. My mom and dad went home to sleep but came back the next morning. At 8 AM I text my mom to get a fruit bowl for me (apparently that is what I was craving). Dr. Pohl came in to check and see how I was doing. He told me that it was so much better for me to have a c-section because the baby's head was too big and would have probably just gotten stuck.
First picture of my sweet baby!

We then found out he would be going to Egleston and had our parents and siblings rush here because they had not been able to see him yet and we didn't know what would happen at Egleston. I was a mess and wanted to make sure I could see my baby before he left, especially since I didn't know when I would see him again. That was the hardest part about the c-section decision was that I would bed-ridden for longer than if I had him vaginally. My aunt and the NICU staff surprised me because they brought him to the room and told me I would be able to hold him! It was the best moment and best feeling ever! I hated saying goodbye to my sweet baby :( Josh stayed for a few minutes and we actually heard the ambulance taking him from the hospital. He and his parents and sisters then left to go be with Sawyer and get some updates and my parents stayed here with me.
I am so in love with this sweet baby!

First family picture :) PERFECTION
Whew, that was a lot! I just wanted to get everything down so I don't forget and also wanted to share it with you all. Sawyer is our gift from God and no matter how frustrated or upset I get, I have to remember that God loves all of us and has already wrapped his hands around us. I will update more about my time in the hospital and continue to keep you all posted on how Sawyer is doing. I am blown AWAY by all the people praying for us and following our story. I hope we are able to bless you all in the ways you have blessed us. I am so thankful that God has placed you all in our lives for support, because that is what we need most right now.

Joshua 1:9 -- "Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged, for the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go.


Love,
Ashlyn

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